Questions. I Have Questions.

1. If there were a task in your life that made the majority of your days difficult for a short period of time (say, an hour or so), that made you stressed out with your children and grumpy and frustrated, but that your husband sort of expected you to do (and really appreciated and enjoyed) and, truth be told, you sort of expected it of yourself, would you keep doing it? Would you keep spending the time to do something that part of your family actively loved and expected and enjoyed, but that another part of your family made difficult and did not appreciate at all?

I am talking about making dinner, to be clear. My husband loves it, eats it, raves about it, looks forward to coming home to it after a long day. My kids don't eat it, complain about it, make me feel guilty for ignoring them from 4:30 - 5:30 while I try to get it on the table. They'd be thrilled with PB&J/macaroni and cheese/grilled cheese/kid food; my husband would not. I feel like there's a whole "If you love your family, you'll make a savory yet nutritious meal for them every night" expectation when you're a mom, too, and, truth is, I really DO love to cook. So I want to do this, and - in theory - I want our girls to grow up eating healthy food and appreciating new things and learning how to cook and bake. But the way it works - in practice - is that the girls fight or completely destroy an entire floor of the house during the time I'm cooking; I have to stop chopping onions/stirring the risotto/making the meatballs 85 times to go sort it out; and then, when we finally sit down to dinner, 9 times out of 10 the girls essentially don't eat what I've cooked. And it's so DISCOURAGING. I refuse to make separate meals, so I end up saying things like, "This is what's for dinner. Eat what you like and try a bit of everything. Tomorrow we'll have something else." But Jemma will barely tolerate the smell of certain foods, refuses to even have them on her plate, and I don't want to turn this into a battle. Annie is more receptive, but essentially doesn't care and would be just as happy eating something that took 2 seconds to whip up. It all just feel so POINTLESS and I am tempted to open a can of cream of mushroom soup and pour it over some ground beef and call it a casserole and be done with it.

2. We've started expecting the girls, especially Annie, to perform certain household chores on a daily or weekly basis. For example, she now puts away her clean laundry, makes her bed every morning, and is expected to help set and clear the table at dinnertime. Jason and I have been talking about giving her an allowance for this, mostly because we want to start teaching her how to manage money. I got one when I was little, and I was expected to set aside a percentage to give away, a percentage to put in a savings account, and then I could spend the rest on whatever I liked.

I like this idea, but I also like the idea of kids being asked to do chores simply because they are part of the family. I want them to know what it is to contribute for the sake of helping out and not just focus on being paid for the things they do. So, what do you think? Allowance tied to chores to teach money management, or chores for the sake of contributing to the family? I like BOTH ideas.